I know you'll probably never understand it, but the crayons, the coloring pages, the glitter markers are all a savage attempt to cling on to hope and sanity. Just as I know your games, books, and awful tv shows give you a sense of hope and adventure the world's too stubborn to give.
There's even an entire song about coloring the inch worm "inchworm" and another one about how entirely maddening it was trying to find a crayon in "piggy bank" which is officially my least favorite color on the planet.

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